Say It Clearly Loader

Communication for happy and healthy relationships

31st Aug 2020

"You should've asked' I saw this meme on Facebook recently and it really made me think. Here’s the link if you haven’t read it yet. https://english.emmaclit.com/2017/05/20/you-shouldve-asked/

Read it first and then come back. If this couple depicted knew what effective communication looks like, sounds like and feels like, this situation possibly could have been avoided. Of course, there are many reasons why the situation could have arisen in the first place, but that’s why it is important to find your voice and use your words so every situation can be a win:win (thanks Stephen Covey for this very effective phrase). How can you create a win:win so to avoid this unhappy situation?

  1. Both parties must be ready to create a better solution and this involves making a time and space to discuss how
  2. During the conversation listening to understand, not to reply. (Thanks again Stephen Covey)
  3. ‘Removing blame and criticism from your dialogue’ so you can really get to the heart of the issue. (Dr Gay Hendricks)
  4. Clearly state what you want and why, PLUS the end result if this doesn’t happen
  5. Be consistent with following through and making sure both parties hold up their end of the win:win agreement.

We all have brought history into our relationships today. It’s different now, being able to clearly state how it’s going to look and this is how we articulate what we want openly and honestly for our relationships to be healthy and happy.

Of course, easier said than done, it does take strength and perseverance but if we want our situations to improve, it’s up to us to make the changes.

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Get in touch with Miriam to discuss how she can help you.